The Sour Age

Week 6 Review

November 3, 2009

By Jack Skunk

An Odd (but Nice) day Edition

Well, they did it- they had a successful All-Star Game. I never thought I’d see the day, but there was a game, pizza, and BEvERages as advertised. Oh, and there were a few games of field-disc before hand to help determine seeds for this whole “play-off” and “league champion” thing. Have I mentioned that Black is stacked? Oh well. On to the recaps.

Round 1

“4!” (3-3) versus “Red Scare” (3-3)

The Reds and Whites traded points early on, in a game that just wasn’t super serious. Scare, of course, was short handed, but played fairly well, with Scott and Dr. D both stepping up. 4!, though, quite simply had too much fire power. In soft-cap, an unforced error gave the Whites a short field, and they quickly converted. Final: 12-10, 4!

“No Fear” (3-3) versus “Hell’s Bells” (5-1)

I used to think it was a sign of great leadership when a team starts off down and on the ropes, but then comes back and pulls off a narrow victory in the end. Hell’s Bells, of course did that… again. Frankly, I think they’re just showing off. “Oh, look at us! We’re losing! But, oh wait: now we’re not playing dumb and winning! Yay us.” C’mon Silver. Come up with another act. Next, I expect you all to start flopping randomly on the field like soccer players. Lovely. Final: 12-10, Hell’s Bells.

“7 Seas” (2-4) versus “32 Colts” (4-2)

Ok, this is odd. The Seas won! How? Well, of course we know that the top-tier Colts were all out, but was there anything else to that? Answer: no. The smaller, tighter team of Navy was able to overcome the Colts, even though the Colts were playing up a player. Oh no! Black is vulnerable! Black might lose early in the playoffs! Ha ha. That’s what I would say if I were a frickin’ moron. The results of this game were meaningless. Still, good job Seas. Final: 12-10, 7 Seas (I need a score verification).

“Golden Girls” (1-5) versus “Green Goblins” (3-3)

Do you know what’s cute? Me and Brianna both picked the girls to win because we like Gold. We think they’ve got strong players who can handle and move the disc. Turns out though, that being popular doesn’t score points. We like you, you’re awesome, and yet you lost… again. So it goes. Final: 13-6, Goblins.

All Star Game

Team RJ (Darks) versus Team Phil the Showkiller (Lights):

This was a fun game to watch, but the issue was never in doubt. Showkiller came out to play, and RJ’s darks came out to play around. Still- I don’t think the Darks could have won even if they tried. There were moments of brilliance on both sides, but as for the heckling, I’d give it about 4 Stars out of 10. Final: 13-8, Lights.

Rankings:

1. Hell’s Bells (5-1)- Ok, you’re at the top of the pyramid, but don’t get too comfy. The Colts are going to be there next week, and you may or may not have the firepower to stop them. Sure, you’ve got more wins, but guess what! You get to play for seed next week. If you have a farm, and are inclined to gamble, don’t put the money on yourselves. That’s my friendly piece of advice.

2. 32 Colts (4-2)- Yeah, you didn’t show up to play. So what? Where were three of your stars? Oh, at Nationals! That’s right. I forgot. Yeah, you guys are fine. There’s no way you lose this one, and here’s my prediction for Fall League: it’s going to be long, it’s going to be black, and there’s no escape. Cheers!

3. 4! (3-3)- You guys are a truly talented team, with speed, with hucksters, and women who know how to play. Fortunately though, you don’t take the game too seriously. Ha ha. It’s going to be hilarious when you play Black and call for an all hammer point. Brilliant! As you lose, the jokes going to be on everyone else since you’ll be the ones laughing on the sideline. Ha ha ha. Good times.

4. Red Scare (3-3)- Oh, Red Scare. Remember how you guys used to call yourselves “My Bloody Valentine” and you were good? Yeah, that was a long time ago. I always knew that you were a middle of the pack kind of team. I’d rank you lower, but Royal is loaded with those crazy college kids, so you’ll probably get to escape with a “winning” season since Royal won’t be around next week. Good for you. Now, here’s what you do: throw the game in the Quarters so that you have a chance in the B-Pool.

5. No Fear (3-3)- There used to be a time when I thought that you guys were good and focused, and ready to take care of business. But then, as it turns out, you were just playing the bottom three teams. I’m sure you can turn “it” on like a light-switch. But oh wait- I’m all about trends, so here’s another riddle: What’s a bright pretty shade of blue and in a nose- dive? Yup! No Fear! Yay!

6. Green Goblins (3-3) You have the same record as No Fear, but unlike them, you’ve kind of found your groove. I keep saying that you guys are my dark horse. From here on out, each game you play is probably going to be too close to call. Whoever faces you in the opening round better be ready. Flip that coin, baby, and hope for heads.

7. 7 Seas (2-4) I have no idea how you beat the Colts, so congratulations. It’s your birthday. Now, go celebrate, drink a beer, get drunk, and then call your ex and try and remind them how great you guys were together and how much you’ve changed. But then, when they threaten to call the cops, you should go home, throw up and then go to sleep. Wait… that’s kind of been your entire League experience. Freaky!

8. Golden Girls (1-5) Hello Girls. I chose you last week against Green because I thought you were “due.” Turns out that you weren’t, aren’t, or ever will be. There’s no shame in losing- as long as you do it honorably. Here are some other platitudes: Bullies will back down if you stand up to them; guys don’t ask you out because they’re “intimidated”; and… I dunno. That’s all I’ve got.

Predictions will be out on Tuesday.

Jack Skunk, skunk of skunks